Sunday, June 18, 2017

Friends Are The Best Therapy

OK, I actually think cats are the best therapy, but friends are a very close second. Nothing stops suicidal thoughts, depressive down-spirals, or anxiety fits like have a friend tell you they care and they have your back.

I managed to get myself out to a Gala event last month and it was great. But there were so many people and it was so busy, there wasn't a lot of chatting or catching up. Well, on Friday I managed to drag my sorry ass to another event. This one was informal and private - that means that Elise, the person who was holding the event, thought that I was enough of a friend that she issued the invite. That in and of itself made me feel wanted and loved. And when I posted my RSVP, a bunch of people replied that they were so glad I was going.

Well, the day arrived and I was feeling crappy. I was still trying to get the Prednisone out of my system and waiting to see if the Xolair injections were going to handle the hives. It was 103 outside, I was having major sweats, and I was nauseated. I had decided early in the afternoon that I wouldn't be able to go. I just didn't feel well enough. And then I lay down for a much-needed nap.

I woke up from my nap still feeling rather crappy, but I decided to hell with it, I was going. Even if I only stayed for 20 minutes, I was still going to show up. Well, I ended up staying for 2 hours. And I had friends coming out of the woodwork. There were so many people there whom I knew and they were all so glad to see me. I was hugged until my ribs were sore. They helped me with my plate of food and my drinks so I didn't have to juggle with my cane and they made sure I wasn't sitting by myself. I met a couple of people face-to-face whom I had only known on Facebook and we chatted and found so many things in common. Oh, it was so wonderful.

I made myself leave at 9 p.m. because I knew I had to get myself calmed down and take my meds and there were people who really wanted me to stay longer. It was so beautiful. I had to stop on the way home because I started crying I was so happy.

This will definitely be a turning point. I now know I can go out to an event and talk to people and be ME and they won't all run screaming. I CAN do this. And I want to do it again. And I am so blessed to have so many awesome people in my life who care what happens to me. We now have another huge roadblock set up in my brain for when I start feeling worthless or suicidal. Knowing that many people care helps me keep fighting.

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