So, I haven't posted much lately, mainly because I don't know how I feel from one moment to the next. I'll guess I'll just have to sum things up.
Physical therapy was going well, but then I started to overload on the social, interacting with humans thing. I sat down with my case worker and we figured out a way to set me up at home with a few fairly simple tools I could buy at Target. Also, the Sitting Tai Chi (Tai Chi for the really messed up) has been really helping with the range of motion in my shoulders. I am not hitting every day - if I have to run errands or have appointments it tends to wear me out - but I have been trying to do PT one day, Tai Chi the next, and back and forth. My energy levels have been better and I am able to do more without stressing out.
On the other end of things, my anxiety has been off the charts. My mother had foot surgery on May 31 (yes, another one. By the time she's done she'll have rebuilt both legs from the ground up) and no matter how much I tried, I couldn't stop myself from freaking out. It didn't help that she was in a massive manic state leading up to the surgery; we tend to feed off each other. I yanked out all my eyelashes and gouged some lovely new holes in my skin. And somehow I gained 15 pounds, so I am back over 200. The extra weight is killing my ankles and knees and making me just frantic to find out what caused the gain.
My anxiety has gone down a bit since the surgery. Because my mom can't put any weight on her foot for a few weeks, they have her in a rehab center. She is doing well and for now, at least, the silence in the house if calming me down. My eyelashes are growing back in (ouch!) and I am trying really hard to let the skin gouges heal. I have put band-aids on the ones I can so I can't pick at them, but some of them - of course - are on my chin where I can't wear a band-aid. They just don't stick because the skin is always moving. [Sigh]
So: good things and bad things. The roller coaster continues.
